Forget All the Handcrafted Cheese: France's Potato Chips Represent Absolutely Decadent.
This past Christmas, I was staying in France, which was on its best behaviour. Elegant, shimmering illuminations, market stalls piled high with exquisitely fresh fruit and vegetables, and such an abundance of fromage that could line the whole Eurotunnel with dairy fat. Piled platters of shimmering crustaceans resting on ice glimpsed through steamy café panes. As I watched a lengthy yet well-mannered line of well-dressed citizens picking up their handmade yule logs, I felt a traitorous thought, that my place of origin, York, which turns into a contemporary interpretation of a scene of decadence during the festive season featuring mince-pie flavoured vapes and BuzzBallz, might benefit from several tips.
The Elegant Facade
But every bit of “art de vivre” stuff is merely an elegant facade – France succumbs just as easily to its basest appetites like any other place. Just go into any grocery store and the truth is revealed. The crisp aisle is an absolute sink of depravity, stacked with such varieties as Roquefort, chickpea fritter, Flemish stew and *beurre salé* profiles. What kind of person consumes a fried potato snack flavoured like dairy spread? It is reminiscent of an item typical of those infamous American fairs where they submerge butter patties in hot oil. One popular comic stated online they are the ultimate chip in her experience, though she has clearly fallen victim to a form of regional conditioning – she grew up in that very region.
International Unregulation
I know the world of potato chip seasoning across the globe is just as anarchic as Silicon Valley. No one will let potato be potato, adorned only rightly by a modest application of seasoning. Our own nation possesses a dubious legacy when it comes to snack tastes in the UK, especially at this time of year. Not long ago, let us not forget, introduced Christmas-cake flavoured crisps and exclusive steak-and-pâté flavoured chips. Let us also recall the occasion when a famous high-street chain deemed “prosecco and winter berry” was an appealing flavour on a potato chip? I expected more from the nation of culinary masters.
What next? *Pâté*-flavoured snacks? Cream puff crisps? Cigarette-tasting crisps? I must cease, before I accidentally suggest the next big thing.
